‘A heart no earthly love can fill’
When I was in my third grade CCD class, my teacher asked us to draw a picture of Heaven and consider how we might live so as one way to be worthy of going there. Though perhaps slightly Pelagian, this lesson had a profound impact on me as I considered which way of life would guarantee my entry. Though I never met a nun, I knew they were married to Jesus, so I figured He’d have to let me into Heaven if I were married to Him. That seemed like the most logical answer at the time!
When I was in my third grade CCD class, my teacher asked us to draw a picture of Heaven and consider how we might live so as one way to be worthy of going there. Though perhaps slightly Pelagian, this lesson had a profound impact on me as I considered which way of life would guarantee my entry. Though I never met a nun, I knew they were married to Jesus, so I figured He’d have to let me into Heaven if I were married to Him. That seemed like the most logical answer at the time!
As I was growing up, my family grew closer to the Lord through the Cursillo movement and began to practice the faith more deeply, while also becoming involved in our parish. I grew to love Our Lady and consecrated myself to her when I was in the sixth grade. Placing myself under her protection, I asked her to teach me to love Jesus like she does, a prayer that would have a tremendous impact on my future vocation.
As time passed and other interests, like boys, drew my attention, my focus shifted away from the Lord and learning more about my faith. While in college at Texas A&M, I was seriously dating a young man who was a Southern Baptist. His questions about what I believed as a Catholic led me to study my faith, and it was then that I fell in love with the Lord all over again.
As my spiritual journey continued, however, I realized the Lord was calling me to a love beyond that of earthly marriage, even though my boyfriend was a good young man. When I went to visit the Dominican Sisters’ Motherhouse in Nashville, Tennessee, and knelt in the chapel for adoration, I knew that God made my heart to be filled only by His infinite love, and it was only in Him that I could find true and lasting happiness.
Twenty-seven years later, I am, more than ever, convinced of the truth of the Lord’s call. I have discovered that I am happiest when I allow myself to be filled and united to Him alone. The moment I stopped batting down thoughts about a religious vocation and surrendered as a bride to her Spouse, I was given a joy and peace no earthly love can give. Now I desire to spend my life thanking Him for this gift.
